Is it time to have a little deep & meaningful?

by | Sep 3, 2018 | Emotional Intelligence, Leadership

So, connection and belonging continues to be a hot topic in our workplaces in particular, some growing gaps in peoples’ ability to communicate in a way that builds strong relationships both internally and externally.

I had the pleasure of going deeper into this topic as I was invited to speak last week at the conference of one of Australians largest media companies (also a place I spent a very happy 3 ½ years as I landed on Australian shores 12 years ago largely because they have a fabulous culture).

As I begun to research and, see some common themes coming up in the coaching room, I started to realize that we are becoming increasingly reliant on different technology platforms to communicate.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I LOVE technology. It enables us to quickly & efficiently connect with an increasing range of people, across multiple platforms, in various forms of content (video, text, emoji), all around the globe…

But, let’s think about the impact of this on how we communicate?
For example:

• When was the last time you sent an email or slacked someone sitting less than 3 feet away from you?

• When was the last time someone called you, you sent them to voicemail and uttered the words in your mind, “just txt me already!”

It’s like we have begun to shy away from verbal or physical conversations – because we are becoming so out of practice so we fear we’ll mess them up or look stupid…

Again, what’s the major risk with screen based conversations?
They become more superficial and transactional and less deep and meaningful. We also start to miss the deeper emotional queues or body language that may hold some of the clues to our conversations getting wildly off track…I think we have all experienced this and the drama and wasted energy that this can bring into the workplace and life!

So, if you are a people-based-businesses like ours, developing your teams ability to courageously communicate, is an absolutely critical skill that also holds the key to a healthy culture and a whole lot of happiness.

So, as sharing is caring, I wanted to give you our top 3 strategies to help you step back into having face to face, courageous conversations with confidence. Because, let’s face it, when we have deep and meaningful conversations, we build juicy, connected relationships, filled with trust and the opportunity to truly be ourselves. How good does that feel?!

1) Plan it out

If we want to build our confidence going into what could be a courageous conversation we need to do a little pre-planning.
It’s crucial to get clear on your intention and the outcome for your conversation so you can set it up well and can keep it on track.

Try answering the following questions;

• What is my intention for this conversation?
• What do I want for me, others, the relationship?
• What is my desired outcome for this conversation?

2) It’s all about perspective

Take it a step further and try to see things from the other persons perspective so you can build empathy for there point of view and find some common ground if you think the conversation might get off track. Ask yourself:

• What is their desired outcome for this conversation?
• What is our shared outcome for this conversation?

3) Create safety

Quite often we are a little nervous as we go into these conversations, we can easily get ‘triggered’ emotionally that can make us get defensive, want to escape the room or freeze like a deer in headlights. Quite often the conversation can then go south because our rational brain can get knocked off-line during this threat response…here are a couple of ways you can recover things for yourself:

• Take a few deep conscious breaths
• Get up and move or move in your seat
• Come back to your shared intention and outcome and reinstate this checking if there is agreement to this
• Call out how you are feeling and suggest a recess

Here’s to many more happy and productive courageous conversations…Looking forward to hearing how you all go, please feel free to drop us a line at info@claretyinc.com with any feedback.

To your health and happiness,

Clare Robinson
Founder & Head Coach

P.S. Here are 3 ways we can help you personally or, the people within your company, take advantage of what’s coming:

  • Join our next ‘Energised Leaders’ Coaching Program
    Are your relationships draining you at the moment or are you struggling to have the conversations that need to be had with those around you? Just hit reply to this email with “ENERGISE” in the subject header and we’ll send you all the juicy details.
  • Request your complimentary workplace wellbeing ideas worksheet?
    Are you a leader tasked with improving the wellbeing of the people in your team or business? Reply with “WORKSHEET” as the subject and we’ll send you our top 5 Proven ways to improve the wellbeing of your people without spending a dollar
  • Work with me and my team privately
    If you’d like to work directly with me and my team in your business to support you to create more connectivity and belonging in your culture, then reply to this email putting “PRIVATE” in the subject line, tell me a little about your business and what you’d like us.

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